Trust is the intersection of the past and the future. It takes evidence from the past and analyzes it into the future. Then you apply the facts within the context of risk. To trust a human being is to be able to anticipate generally how they'll behave in most of the future situations in which you might encounter them, and to feel comfort in taking an (often emotional) risk based on that. If you trust someone, it means you're willing to deliberately put yourself in a situation where that person could hurt you by doing the "wrong" thing. Trust is a balance. Trusting people too much makes you vulnerable, but on the flipside, not trusting people enough makes cooperation difficult or impossible and also severely harms your odds of building meaningful relationships.
Have any of you ever had trust issues? Has a friend betrayed your trust by gossiping about a "secret" you have divulged? Have your children betrayed your trust by disobeying or flagrantly ignoring your expectations of them? Has your spouse betrayed your trust through lying, cheating, or abusing you or your family's finances? Has your employer betrayed your trust by prioritizing their personal interests and needs above the team?
I'm sure we've all experienced the loss of trust in a marriage, a job, or a friend. There are ways to rebuild that trust, but usually the relationship dies a miserable and irreversible death. You try to move on, but just as you think you've succeeded, along come bitter and vengeful thoughts. Trust me! I've been there! In the space of three years, trust in a spouse, a +20-year friendship, and a family member have been totally annihilated.
Do you go grovelling back to them? Never! Once it's done, it's done and there's no going back. You move on, move forward, move to channelling your thoughts to what is right in your mind. Let go of the hideous memories, forgive yourself for either being part of the problem or being blind to someone's character. Remember that song from Disney's "Frozen"? "Let it go!"
One thing in which I am placing my trust is the new (and maybe improved) form of ABC Wednesday, which will be administered by our trusty Melody. She has already lined up two assistant administrators and a group of excited current ABCWers to help her with keeping up with commenting on the participants' contributions. So TRUST IN THIS! Let's keep ABCW going! Only a little over 6 weeks until the new ABCW begins so stay tuned.
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Leslie, I understand. I may have been too trusting in the past.
ReplyDeleteHi Leslie what a touching post!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your recommendation, I indeed always honor trust from another person to me, I know all to well how it feels to get hurt by it when abused.
I will do my very best to make the new ABC at least as much fun as this one, you may trust on that!
Remember Kaa the 'hypnotic' Python,
ReplyDeletefrom Kipling's Jungle Books? (Disney's version)
He would slither around,
googling his eyes
sort of singing......
"Trust In Me
Close your eyes,
you'll be safe and sound
knowing I'm around."
thus hoping to gain MOWGLI's confidence, then he could
crush him and swallow him...
Does that bring anyone to mind Leslie?
best wishes,
Di.
your ABCW buddy.
We usually have to deserve for someone's trust.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! ... Trust is a weird thing ... I have Trusted Too many Twerps ... now Trying to learn how To Trust myself, I Think ...
ReplyDeleteHmm "let it go" ... yeah ... maybe That is what I have finally done ... at least with some of the stress/etc. issues I was having? ... now you mention it - that could be how I suddenly seem to have reached that Turning point I just posted about :)
Terrific intro for "T"!
ReplyDeleteMy "T" is for the TIGER and a cautionary TALE about TERRIBLE fates that await rash TOTS that choose inappropriate pals...
And also for TALLINN!
ReplyDelete