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Tuesday 17 September 2013

J is for JOKES

Okay, since everyone has probably had to get back on track and into their routines after summer holidays, I thought we needed something to amuse us.  So ... to give you a jolly for each day this week, here are seven corny JOKES:

1.  "Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home."  "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome," said the Doc.  "Is that common?" I asked.  "It's not unusual," he replied.
Note from moi:  He just keeps getting sexier every year!  Right, ladies?

2.  I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

3.  I rang up the local telephone company and I said, ''I want to report a nuisance caller.''He said, ''Not you again!'' 

4.  A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. ''But why?'' they asked, as they moved off. ''Because,'' he said, ''I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.''

5.  A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says, "I'm lookin' fer the guy who shot my paw!"

6.   Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.   

7.  and finally,

 

 

 And with all those groans I can hear all the way through my 'puter, have a  
JOLLY JOKEY week!
***


17 comments:

  1. Fun post for the letter J. Thanks for the laughs.

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  2. Here's an example of Canadian humour, though not really a joke.

    CBC Radio ran a contest that asked people to fill in the following: "As Canadian as __________ ."

    The eventual winner was: "As Canadian as possible, under the circumstances."

    Another example is my entry this week: J is for Jan. Poor Jan Brady.

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  3. yep these are evergreen ones... one of my fav is

    Teacher - Make a sentence with I

    Student - I is ............

    Teacher - No its I am

    Student - Ok.... I am the 9th letter of the alphabet

    :D

    PhenoMenon
    http://throodalookingglass.com/2013/09/jefferey-archer/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
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      Delete
  4. Leslie - these are terrible, and I mean that in the very best way possible!

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    1. Well, I "did" say I could hear the groans right through my 'puter. LOL

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  5. Gosh I have missed a lot of letters but so happy to be back with an entry for J!

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  6. LOL! I mean I'm laughing at Roger's comment :D Fun J Week!

    Hazel

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  7. I did have a good chuckle from joke #4! thanks for the JOY!

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  8. Those are awesome!

    To prepare you for the season ahead:

    "It's so cold!" {"How cold is it?"} "It's so cold I saw a lawyer put his hands in his own pockets."

    "It's so cold!" {"How cold is it?"} "It's so cold I overheard a flasher downtown describing himself."

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  9. I like funny jokes and the voice of Tom Jones!

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  10. I like funny jokes and the voice of Tom Jones!

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  11. I always think of a writing a story about a Welsh genealogist so that I could call him or her "Jones the Jones"...

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  12. Wow, amazing choice! J for Jokes..such a nice funny jokes and post.. like it.

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